An excellent article by author, editor and infidelity expert, Keishia Lee-Louis.
Emotional infidelity can start with a simple hi or a wink. It begins in a boardroom or a chatroom. One spouse says, "What's the problem? We're only friends."The other spouse can't believe the reassurances. So the jealousy builds and a wedge is driven between partners. Sometimes nothing really is going on, and sometimes an affair is in progress. It's only a matter of time.
So how can you tell if your spouse is a potential cheater?
How can you stop a relationship from becoming romantic outside of your marriage?
Here are five topics to think about before determining if your marriage is in the danger zone.
1. Secrecy: Do you feel as though your partner could be telling you more about his or her new friend? Or do you hide the details of your platonic relationship from your spouse? If so, why? It's best not to keep secrets from your partner, even if you think he or she will be hurt, angry or jealous. If you want a successful relationship, trust and honesty is the one factor for marriage that should not be compromised.
2. Displaced Trust: Is information that should only be shared between husband and a wife, shared outside of the relationship? Topics like sexual intimacy, irreconcilable differences, personal finances, and detailed accounts of your partner's shortcomings are best left within the constructs of your marriage relationship.
3. Comparing: Does your spouse compare you to friend(s) of the opposite sex often? Or do YOU feel as though your spouse could improve in the areas that your special friend excels? Comparing once or twice may not be a problem, but habitual comparison is a warning sign.
4. Time Management: What type of time do you spend together as a married couple? Is it mainly dutiful, like paying bills or going to conferences for the kids? Or do you actually date-- one-on-one, no kids, family or friends around? If not, and you find yourself, or your partner, engaged in date like activities outside of your relationship, stop it. Either invite your spouse or don't do it anymore. Coffee talk can turn to pillow talk in the blink of an eye.
5. Attraction: Do you feel as though your spouse like the way his/her special friend looks? Are you attracted to the way your friend looks or the way he/she does something? If so, address this issue with your partner and then try to refocus your attention on each other, rather than the outside party.If three to five of these topics need to be addressed in your marriage, I urge you to get professional help either from your religious leader or from a professional counselor.
About the Author
Keishia Lee-Louis is the Editor of http://www.Married4Good.com (November 2005). Her work has appeared on iVillage.com, BibleResourceCenter.com, and in numerous printed publications.Currently, she is writing a book on marriage and relationships (Spring 2006).If you'd like to see more of her work, visit http://married4good.blogspot.com
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Friday, October 06, 2006
How To catch Your Wife Cheating
How To Tell If Your Wife Is Cheating And more Importantly How To stop Her Cheating!
First of all let’s look at the obvious tell tale signs, that your wife is cheating, there are lots of them, but I believe these to be the best.
1. Suddenly, she takes four hours to get ready instead of two!
This is one of the best signs, appearance! New hair style or much more regular visits to the hair salon, different perfume, new clothes, new underwear, has her nails done, etc,etc.
2. Nips out to the shop dressed immaculately and returns two hours later saying she met an old friend from years ago.
3. She panics when the phone rings.
4. Here’s a classic, less arguing at home, she doesn’t mind if you go out with the lads, she lets you do things at home where she always used to moan, nag and make a big deal about it.
Well, there’s just a few of the better cheating wife signs, obviously there are lots more. These signs do not mean your wife is definitely cheating, but I would start taking a close look at her actions and movements. Please don’t jump in screaming, only to find out you were wrong, this could be disastrous.
But what also interests me is how to stop infidelity.
How to stop your wife cheating in the first place.
Be a gentleman! Sounds really corny, but a lady likes to be fussed over, she has to feel loved and needed. Buy her some flowers, chocolates, take her out to dinner, to the cinema. These are things every husband or boyfriend should be doing on a regular basis, it doesn’t mean you have to go crazy, but once a week, or even once a month, make her feel special.
She needs to be your best friend, you need to talk regular about anything and everything, take more of an interest in the things your wife likes, every now and then do something around the house that you don’t normally do, like, collecting the washing, bathing the kids, you may already do these, but simply make a small effort to help out with things you don’t normally do.
If you are reading this article, you probably suspect your wife is cheating, know she’s cheating, or have been cheated on and don’t want it to happen again. It’s not nice and also the husband is normally the last to know when his wife has been cheating.
By me, Simion Seru How To Catch Your Wife Cheating
First of all let’s look at the obvious tell tale signs, that your wife is cheating, there are lots of them, but I believe these to be the best.
1. Suddenly, she takes four hours to get ready instead of two!
This is one of the best signs, appearance! New hair style or much more regular visits to the hair salon, different perfume, new clothes, new underwear, has her nails done, etc,etc.
2. Nips out to the shop dressed immaculately and returns two hours later saying she met an old friend from years ago.
3. She panics when the phone rings.
4. Here’s a classic, less arguing at home, she doesn’t mind if you go out with the lads, she lets you do things at home where she always used to moan, nag and make a big deal about it.
Well, there’s just a few of the better cheating wife signs, obviously there are lots more. These signs do not mean your wife is definitely cheating, but I would start taking a close look at her actions and movements. Please don’t jump in screaming, only to find out you were wrong, this could be disastrous.
But what also interests me is how to stop infidelity.
How to stop your wife cheating in the first place.
Be a gentleman! Sounds really corny, but a lady likes to be fussed over, she has to feel loved and needed. Buy her some flowers, chocolates, take her out to dinner, to the cinema. These are things every husband or boyfriend should be doing on a regular basis, it doesn’t mean you have to go crazy, but once a week, or even once a month, make her feel special.
She needs to be your best friend, you need to talk regular about anything and everything, take more of an interest in the things your wife likes, every now and then do something around the house that you don’t normally do, like, collecting the washing, bathing the kids, you may already do these, but simply make a small effort to help out with things you don’t normally do.
If you are reading this article, you probably suspect your wife is cheating, know she’s cheating, or have been cheated on and don’t want it to happen again. It’s not nice and also the husband is normally the last to know when his wife has been cheating.
By me, Simion Seru How To Catch Your Wife Cheating
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